Hey there Reader,

So. It is officially May.

I know, I know... I've checked.

Twice.

Because as some of you very kindly pointed out last week, I got the dates spectacularly wrong (again) whilst joking with you about getting dates wrong.

The irony was not lost on me!

I am, if nothing else, consistent.

But it did get me thinking.

What happens when we hear something often enough that we just… stop questioning it?

Not because it's obviously true.

Not even because it feels good to believe it.

Just because repetition has a way of quietly disguising itself as fact.

And of course it has an official name.

It's called the illusory truth effect.

And in the most basic terms, it means our brains learn through repetition — not accuracy.

Which is why you can logically know something not to be true and still feel, deep down, like it is.

Sound familiar?

A lot of the stories we carry about ourselves — the ones that say we're too much, not enough, fundamentally broken, or just a bit of a disaster — didn't start as beliefs we chose.

They started as things we heard.

Over and over.

From people, from systems, from our own exhausted inner monologue after one too many hard days.

And the brain, filed all of that away as data.

That's not a personal failing.

That's how repetition works.

The slightly annoying — and also quietly hopeful — thing is that it works in both directions.

The same process that embedded the unkind stuff can be used, gently and over time, to start dismantling it.

Not with a big dramatic overhaul.

Just with repetition of something slightly different.

So take some time this week to try this.

Next time you catch yourself in a full spiral — why am I like this, I'm useless, everyone hates me, classic me, can't do anything right — see if you can just pause it there and swap the whole thing for three words:

Oh. That's interesting.

That's it. Nothing more required.

You don't have to understand it yet.

You don't have to fix it.

You just have to get curious instead of furious — and I say that knowing full well it's easier said than done, especially when your brain has been practicing the furious bit for years.

But repetition starts with the first one.

I'll be back later this week with a bit more on what to actually do with that curiosity once you've caught it.

In the meantime, reply and let me know — is there a belief you're carrying that you know on some level isn't really serving you? I'd love to hear about it.

Best and brightest love Beth x

P.S. If you want a space where getting curious is actively encouraged (and nobody's going to judge you for getting the month wrong), the Curious Minds Collective might be exactly what you're looking for. Come and have a look.